Your closet is full of boudoir treasures.

One of the common misconceptions about boudoir photography is the fact that you have to wear the classic lingerie set during your shoot. FALSE!

Well, if it is what you really want to wear of course you can. There are gorgeous set of lingerie that are perfect for boudoir. But you can also wear so many other pieces! Anything can be turned into a boudoir outfit, all you have to do is to show some skin. You can be creative, mix and match different pieces, wear clothes you bought once but never wear because they are too “extravagant”, too colourful, or too sexy.

You don't have to play by the rules

It is very common to focus on your femininity if you identify as a women, or focus on your masculinity if you identify as a men, which is totally fine if it is what you prefer. But those are not rules set in stones. Unfortunately, there are a lot of stigma around femininity and masculinity, so often people don't dare to explore this hidden side of their personality. Whatever you identify as, don't be afraid to play with both of your masculine and feminine side.

If you are a men, you could for example wear a dark colour robe with heels. Or maybe wear some makeup, such as eye shadow. For women, you could try wearing a leather jacket, your hair up, and take a masculine attitude.

There are plenty of creative ways to embrace both side, without choosing to be cliché about them. See photography as a game, an experience you will try only a few times in your life, so you might as well have fun. The pictures are for you, at the end of the day you treat yourself the way you want.

You don't have to choose only one persona

Contrary to popular belief, we all have different personalities coming out depending of our mood, life events, weather,… So why would you stick to only one persona during your shoot?

You don't have to choose between being cute, badass, or sexy, be all of them! It is the same idea style-wise. During your shoot you can absolutely go from a cosy vibe, to a sultry and mysterious one. And maybe finish your session with some artistic nudes. If you do a shoot with us, we will tell you to bring a big suitcase with you, full of different pieces :)

Rock your wardrobe

Here are a few examples of what to bring. You will see that most of the items listed below are pieces you can easily find in your closet:

Bodysuits:

Those are our favourite pieces. Why? Because they look fabulous on every type of bodies, and you can find in so many different cuts and styles. On top of that, if you feel a tad uncomfortable with your belly, it will help to show it without uncover it completely.

Jackets & coats:

Those are great pieces to rock different styles (femme fatale, rock,…). We usually suggest to go topless with them, or depending of the length of the coat, to go fully naked. It is perfect to create some sexiness without showing to much.

High panties:

You can combine a high waisted panty, with pantyhose, and a bra or sweater, to a create a “flash dance” outfit. Or even the high panty, with a blazer and some pearls, for a totally different style.

Dresses:

Dresses are really pretty in boudoir, especially if they are see-through to play with your silhouette, and flowy to add some movement. Not sensual enough? Grab the bottom of your dress to show some thighs, or put one of the straps down to be more playful…

Jeans & pants:

Those are always a must, especially for men. Wearing a jean or pants, and being topless is such a great look for everyone.

And so much more…

Everything in your closet can be used for boudoir: faux fur shawl or jacket, blouses, shorts, corsets, skirts,… It is not about the cloth itself, it is about how you use it, and with what other pieces you combine it.

Don't forget the accessories as well: heels, jewelry and props, are a great addition to your outfits. We had Scandals bringing their most colourful necklaces, highest pleasers, bottle of whisky or wine, cheese platters, fruits, their pets (how badass it is to have your dog posing next to you for a shot?), and other amazing accessories.

Doing a boudoir shoot is the opportunity to take time for yourself, have fun, and let your amazing, badass, and sensual-self out. It is by letting go (of pressure, expectations, and judgment) that you will be able to relax, do all the things you wanna do, and live life by your own rules 💪

Check out some outfits ideas below:

Why did we open a boudoir photography business?

Hi you!

We are Fanny and Juliette, two frenchies living in Toronto since 2013, and Scandaleuse Photography's mommies. Today we want to re-introduce ourselves in case you are new in our community or you want to know more about us.

A little bit of our personal life.

31 and 29 years old. Capricorn and Pisces. Both spiritual and vegetarian. When we are not shooting our badass scandals, you can find us climbing a pole or doing some drops (sounds weird, let us clarify: two of our favourite hobbies are pole dance and aerial silk 🎪).

We have been friends since 2009. Our strong friendship started near Paris, in photography school. What helped us bond? Probably our love for vino & cheese, and coffee & pastries (food, food, food… on n’est pas françaises pour rien!). Also the fact we are both bold and pretty stubborn was a big trigger for what we are about to tell you…

Throwback summer 2012: we were both in transition. Between being done with school, not knowing what to do next, and a big desire to get out of our home country. We had that idea to go live in London (England) but without really a moving date in mind. Early September, same year, I received a call from Juliette:

“I found cheap train tickets to London, departure in 2 weeks, what do you wanna do?”

I probably thought about it for 3 seconds, “let's do it!” I said. Suitcases packed, 2 weeks later we were in the train to London, nothing else ever felt so natural before that. It was meant to be!

Then, Scandaleuse was born!

Our time in London was a lot of fun (with a few struggles on the road, but those are part of any adventures), until it was time to change country again. Our choice: Canada 🍁.

Moving forward 2015, Toronto (if you want to know the details about London and our move to Canada, click here):

After spending 10 years working for other people (yes, we started working at a young age!) in divers field, we had that huge craving to open our own business rather than keep working for other people's dreams.

The only obstacle standing in our way (beside the fear of starting this big project 😱) was for me (Fanny) to get my permanent residence, which took me a while to get but eventually made it happen!

Remember when we shared about our love for food, well we took the decision to open our business over coffee and pastries (we also found the name over food… and most of our tons of ideas)!

via GIPHY

So why boudoir photography? Why going for such a small niche instead of the traditional portrait or wedding? Well for a few reasons:

• We were both fascinated by the woman body while being in photography school and we were kinda shooting boudoir already without knowing it was called boudoir (the story of boudoir photography is very interesting, check it out here).

• We are not traditional women to begin with, so choosing to do another type of photography just because it will be easier was not our jam. We like challenges, and on top of that we love to do what we are passionate about!

• But most importantly we wanted to change the face of boudoir photography that was (and unfortunately still is for most studios) not very inclusive. All we could see was those gorgeous and photoshopped professional models, standing on beds, in hotel rooms, in either very cute poses or sexual ones.

We were honestly tired to only see what we just described. Since nobody was making a change, we decided to shoot boudoir in our own way:

Making it accessible to every genders, body types, and ages!

We wanted to create an experience where people would be able to be 100% themselves, and where they could learn to like their body THE WAY IT IS. Then something magical happened… We realized that on top of creating beautiful images and spreading body love, we were also changing our scandals’ life. Because boudoir photography is not just about having beautiful pictures of yourself, it makes you feel like you can conquer the world and go after what you want in life. We are lucky to stay in touch with most of our clients, who share their life transformations. A few months after their shoot, we heard people quitting their job, leaving their relationship that was not working anymore…

When you take the decision to strip down in front of two strangers, nothing else can stop you from building the life you want 😄

Boudoir photography is a powerful experience that transforms you in a such amazing way, and makes you want to live your life fully. If you never try, we highly recommend it.

Even if Juliette and I made it happen with hard work, patience, and perseverance, we are so grateful to be able to follow our passion, and meet badass people with different style, and life story.

if you are not part of our community yet, FEEL FREE TO JOIN US ON OUR INSTAGRAM OR SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER TO GET NEWS & UPDATES!

All the "no’s" have simply been guiding me to bigger "Yes’s"

This post is a part of our series “If I Had Listened", in which we're reached out to strong-minded women we admire to tell us about a moment they chose to trust their gut and follow a different path despite other people's opinion.

If I had listened to all the "no’s" I wouldn’t have received all the "yes’s".

The amount of "no’s" that I have faced in my career have been endless, and have truly made me doubt my self worth and purpose.

But what I have grown to understand is that all the "no’s" have simply been guiding me to bigger "Yes’s".

My dance journey began at an older age than most, so for me I was always the underdog, always one step behind those of my peers. It used to frustrate me, because it seemed like no matter how hard I worked I wasn’t reaching the level of those around me. Little did I know this struggle was developing me & prepping me to receive all the blessings that lied ahead.

I began to build a humble foundation, understanding that nothing great would come easy, and that hard work, sacrifices and pain would make receiving the reward that much more valuable.

With time & continued dedication my training lead me to become a dance student at Ryerson University’s Dance program. Accepting my offer was an absolute dream come true. I was a small town girl moving to the big city to pursue her dance dreams. I felt like Jody Sawyer from "Centre Stage", the ballerina with the non stereotypical ballet body, and average ballet technique that Ryerson was taking a chance on, and funny enough that was exactly how my story unfolded.

I was in a program that was stripping everything beautiful about me away, and trying to squeeze me into a box that I would never fit into.

It was so damaging and so heartbreaking because I wanted nothing more than to meet their unrealistic and unattainable requirements so badly, but the truth was, I never would. The program beat me down, and stole my love for dance completely away from me. I was told that I would never be enough, that there was no place for me in the industry and that it was best if I looked at other career options. Ouufff, at the age of 19, those words were so damaging, because I admired and respected my teachers so much. My dreams of pursuing dance professionally, slowly seemed unattainable & unrealistic.

Now this was a defining moment for me, because I faced a crucial "No" at such an influential time in my life. I was young, impressionable, and easily influenced by my mentors, but something deep inside wasn’t allowing that "No" to define who I was.

I knew that there was a place for me in this industry and if there wasn’t I needed to create a place, and that is exactly what I did.

I used all those “no’s” to drive me to so many successful “yes's”, one very important "yes" being my heels company Sensual Heeling Inc.

Many times I’ve been asked “how did you know you wanted to be a dancer/choreographer and found your own heels company Sensual Heeling?” and the answer is I didn’t know, I didn’t know that any of this was achievable, let alone successful. I think the most beautiful part of it all is that I just didn’t give up, even at my lowest of lows, I kept on striving to be the best version of myself, despite what that looked like to others.

Many laughed at me, judged me, and doubted that my talent wasn’t enough to turn my passion into a success story, but here I am still standing strong, inspiring so many women each and every single day through my heels company Sensual Heeling. It truly comes down to your own personal happiness. Dance makes me happy, despite all the "no’s" I’ve received and continue to receive, dance always brings me back to a place of joy. Just as much as it has brought me joy, it has also brought me heartache. But nothing worth fighting for comes easy, and I’d rather have moments of unhappiness building a career that continually brings me back to a place of pride & joy then a career that is just sufficient.

My biggest piece of advice is stop waiting for approval, stop allowing all the "no’s" to define you. We as humans wait and we yearn for the approval of others when in the big picture the only approval that matters, is your own. You need to ensure you are living life for yourself and no one else, because if you aren’t happy then what is the value in living?

Kaela is 100% right, it is very important to live your life by your own rules and to not be afraid to become unapologetically you!

And we have something just for you that will help you get there! We have put together 6 easy tips you can use now to better your life. All you have to do is click below to get them!

How to set yourself free with Michelle x SheDoesTheCity

This article is part of our collaboration with She Does The City & Womanizer, in which we help them feature fierce AF womxn in boudoir photo shoots.

We’re thrilled to have Michelle for our final boudoir feature of 2020, because her energy is frankly what the world needs more of. We’ve been following Michelle for awhile on Instagram and she’s someone who always lights us up and makes us smile, be it from her humour, her glowing confidence, or dance moves that pop off the screen. We’re big fans.

Tell us a little about yourself…

I’m a queer midlife mom championing for diversity, inclusion and equality.

Professionally I’m a communications geek, multi-disciplined educator, social activist and content creator. I’m also very passionate about womxn’s rights advocacy and can often be heard speaking on issues facing marginalized communities, radical self-acceptance and self-reinvention.

How did doing this photoshoot make you feel?

It was truly a liberating and empowering experience. Juliette and Fanny made me feel very comfortable and at home during this photoshoot. This was my first time ever being a model and they were professional, patient and kind every step of the way.

When it comes to feeling good in your own skin, what advice would you give to your younger self?

I would tell my younger self that you could be the juiciest, yummiest peach and there will still be someone who doesn’t like peaches. That doesn’t mean that you’re not a delicious peach. You’re perfect.

What always puts a smile on your face?

My daughter.

What turns you on?

Independent womxn who enjoy their own company and have a quiet confidence about them. Womxn who are authentically themselves, goal-oriented, love adventure and have a quirky sense of humour. Yummy.

What has become an important part of your self care routine during COVID?

Self-care? What’s that! I’m still trying to implement a self-care routine in my life but, I would say not dating is my biggest form of self-care right now.

Loving myself and my daughter is my number one priority at the moment.

What lesson or idea is currently helping you on your path?

When people show you who they are, believe them.

What small things help you get through winter? Or what are you planning this year to help you?

Conversations with loved ones, self-pleasure and comfort food.

How would you describe your sexuality?

I identify as a queer femme/lesbian. I am attracted to different genders, but with womxn is where I feel most at home.

Anything else you’d like to share?

Give zero fucks. It will set you free.

Hell yes, we love this last advice! Do not hesitate a minute to live your life by your own rules and don't be afraid to become unapologetically you.

And we have something just for you that will help you get there! We have put together 6 easy tips you can use now to better your life. All you have to do is click below to get them!

Andrea's celebrating her new found confidence - Scandaleuse X She Does The City

Today we are sharing the interview of the beautiful Andrea who had a boudoir shoot with us this year to celebrate her 29th birthday. She is also part of the our Lockdown Special (clic here for all the details) as she recently opened her new candle business (we are so proud of her for taking this step 💛) and is offering a special deal.

This article is part of our collaboration with She Does The City & Womanizer, in which we help them feature fierce AF womxn in boudoir photo shoots.

Andrea grew up in a religious and conservative family. Sexuality wasn’t something that was openly discussed. She didn’t think she’d ever be in a place where she’d feel comfortable to do a boudoir photo shoot.

Like so many of us, it took time for Andrea to find her own path. To prevent caving to external pressures or getting influenced by all the “shoulds”, she’s had to stay vigilant with her vision, and trust her gut. At 29, she’s feeling comfortable with where she’s landed, and decided to book a photo shoot with Juliette and Fanny of Scandaleuse Photography to celebrate her newfound confidence. We want to celebrate her too. 

What was it that made you want to do a boudoir shoot with Scandaleuse? 

I’ve always wanted to do a boudoir shoot. As a girl who grew up in a conservative & religious family and culture, I thought it wouldn’t be possible. Most of the boudoir shoots I saw were celebrities or models; I had no access to a photographer who would do a boudoir shoot for me, let alone guide me on how to do it.

A few years later, I moved to one of the greatest cities in the world, matured more & met Fanny & Juliette of Scandaleuse Photography.

I used to be afraid of getting older; I thought any age after 25 was simply old. But I luckily outgrew that thinking. WhenI was planning my 29th birthday, I decided I wanted it to be special, since this will be my last year in my 20’s.

I thought, “I should just do that boudoir shoot that I’ve been wanting for so long!” I know reputable photographers & I am finally accepting/loving my body as it is. 

What was it like to get photographed by Juliette & Fanny? How did the experience make you feel? 

It was honestly the best experience I’ve had. I’ve worked with other great photographers but no experience came close with the one I had with Fanny & Juliette. With them, I was truly confident, and they guided me well. I genuinely felt their warmth & passion. It’s obvious that they do what they do because they love it. 

When it comes to feeling good in your own skin, what advice would you give to your younger self? 

Stop seeking approval from people who do not matter! Be authentically you, and the rest will just follow. I am different & that’s special. I am different from my friends & cousins, and that’s fine, because that means I have my own identity. Every time I tried to work on my creative side, I did not get 100% support from people I expected support from. I got hurt, and that’s okay. I just kept going. You are your #1 fan and supporter.

Be there for yourself. Be your own standard of happiness. Be your own standard of beauty. Be your own standard of success.

This does not come overnight, it took me years—and I am still learning this. 

What always puts a smile on your face? 

The good deeds that I get to witness every day. Big or small gestures make me happy.

What has become an important part of your self care routine during COVID? 

Having a rest day, to reflect, nourish my mind & just be me.

If we charge our phones from time to time, we should do that to ourselves as well.

Get that good 8-hour sleep, write in your journal, turn that phone off, put on your favourite movie, hydrate yourself, do that bubble bath, eat good food & so on. 

What lesson or idea is currently helping you on your path? 

Just do you. It will not be easy. There may be defeats, but you are not done. Continue what you are doing and don’t stop until you are at your own definition of success. I’m saying this as I am currently on my path of being an entrepreneur. I opened a small candle business in November and consider it my baby. 

What small things help you get through winter? Or what are you planning this year to help you? 

Time Management! I currently work a 9-6 job and own a small business as well. This is why journals & planners truly help me. I get to write down tasks I need to do for the day & also plan my rest days. Getting organized is the way.

How would you describe your sexuality? 

As someone who came from a conservative & religious family, sexuality and sex was a taboo topic. I never truly learned how to address sexual feelings or know my sexuality. I’ve learned more as I’ve matured. I believe sexuality & sex should be a natural topic—sex is a natural & wonderful thing! I believe it is a sacred exchange of energy. If you have someone who matches your energy, great, if not, that’s fine; just keep swimming. I am happy that I found someone who matches mine, who accepts & acknowledges my needs.  

Anything else you’d like to share? 

To anyone finding their purpose and/or passion, if you do not have the answer in front of you right now, it’s okay, some things take time. Enjoy the present. Live in the moment! Once you realize what it is/they are, your creative juices will just naturally flow.

To anyone who wants to do a bold move, do it!

As long as you are not hurting anyone intentionally and your intention is good, go for it! I hope everyone is safe & healthy during these uncertain times.

Boost your self-confidence & reconnect with yourself with our FREE confidence challenge!

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I turned 30

Hey Scandals, Fanny writing today!

I want to share with you my experience on turning 30. I feel like there are a lot of expectations coming from others but also from our own beliefs about starting a new decade. Generally speaking we believe that by 30 we should have our life together: be a home owner, married with kids and a carrier. So we put a lot of pressure on our shoulders thinking with HAVE to fit in this mold.

My friends, this is not the reality anymore (was it ever?) ! So let's dust off all of those expectations that, frankly, are just here to create more stress and anxiety. We don't want that in our life, do we?

Last January I turned 30 and honestly I was fine (end of the article, thanks for reading).

More seriously! I am the type of person who is not afraid to get old and die, so age was never really a struggle for me. But apparently it is a harder topic for others…

You see, people expect you to feel bad about turning 30, especially if you are:

• a woman;

• who is single;

• with no kids.

Like me! So around my birthday, I have heard them all:

“You must be so sad to turn 30?”

“Still no kids hein!”

“Are you single by choice?"

“When are we seeing a ring on your finger?”

“You are not 25 anymore, time to get settled!”… Blablabla.

For those who know me, you will not be surprised to hear that instead of feeling angry, I tried to educate those people but man it asks for a lot of patience!

It is really easy for people to guilt trip others, especially if they believe they know better. It is usually done in a “I am joking” way but the result is the same: we feel bad about our life choices and start doubting ourself.

The way I see it is we have 3 options here:

• we give up and make choices towards a life than is not ideal for us;

• we feel angry at them, carrying negativity and frustration around. The chances are we are gonna explode at some point and start useless confrontations.

• or, we ignore them and keep focusing on how we want to live our life (I vote for this one!)

Personally I believe some people are not worth my energy. I am happy with my lifestyle and would not trade it with anybody else. It makes me feel free and I know I am going towards the right path, meaning the one towards what I want to achieve.

Don't be afraid to dig into what you truly want and take actions to make them happen.

If your loved ones don't understand and disagree, then this is not your problem. In the end, it does not really matter what they think, they are not you. The best fight you can start is towards the life you wanna build for yourself.

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Don't be afraid to embrace your sensuality

For hundreds of years, sensuality has been related to sexuality. And even if both can be connected (when you learn to develop your sensuality, you learn to appreciate your body the way it is, which opens up your sexuality), sensuality can have a much bigger impact than leading to sex:

It helps feeling liberated!

What is sensuality?

If you Google it, you will read the common definition of sensuality is:

The enjoyment, expression, or pursuit of physical, especially sexual, pleasure.

But sensuality is also defined as the ability to feel in touch with all our senses: touch, smell, sight, hearing, taste and any extrasensory perceptions beyond our five commonly recognized senses.

If sensuality is often interpreted as sexuality, it is because of that one thing they have in common. PLEASURE. What can be more difficult to understand is this notion of pleasure: some things can give you sexual pleasure and others can be pleasurable without sexual desire.

Sensuality can increase your sexual behaviour but can also be about enjoying simple pleasures, such as watching a sunset, flavourful food, a massage, a perfume or any particular smell, a yoga pose, feeling the sun on your skin… Anything that makes you feel amazing in the moment but isn't related to sex.

Why is it important to embrace it?

As women we heard it all:

“Be polite. Dress up properly. Be a good girl!" they say.

Most of us have been told to never be too loud because people will think we are hysterical. We have been told to not take too much room otherwise we are just showing off. Neither to show too much skin because we are whores if we do. So we cover ourselves up, forget how to be in touch with our femininity and let our true essence disappears. And for what? Well just to please others and fit in a mold.

Not loving our whole-self enough leads to frustration, jealousy and sadness. How can we expect to be happy and live the life we want, when we are filled with all those negative feelings?

Well, learning to grow that sensual side we all have is a way to start feeling in harmony with our body, which increases our self-confidence and trust in others. And since sensuality is connected to all of our senses, it also develops our creativity, imagination and intuition (I'll take two of those please… how can you say no to that!).

How can you develop your sensuality?

When at peace with our whole-self, we are less likely to feel stressed in our every day life. We also don't feel the need of external validation: what people can think of us does not matter anymore. It creates a new level of self-love!

So, are you tempted to start caring about your sensuality? Or to develop it even more than you already do? Well, we do… Just writing this blog post makes us curious about what is next on our sensuality list!

So far, here is what we do to cultivate sensuality:

• Boudoir photography:

  Surprise! We might be biased but this his a huge part of our life, so we cannot talk about sensuality without mentioning the art of boudoir. Come on, can you think of a more powerful tool to develop your sensuality than boudoir photography: having (pardon our french) the balls to pose half naked -or naked- and still feel badass and empowered… ? That's what we think :)

• Pole Dance & Aerial Silk:

  You maybe saw us online or heard us talk about those two acrobatic activities. They are tough to do and painful but man, it's worth it! They are both incredible for flexibility, strength and core. We train with music, create our own choreography to work on our sensuality and sexiness.

• Stretching:

  Anything that is related to movement has a positive impact on sensuality. Gifting your body with more flexibility is very important for our physical and mental health. It keeps the muscles flexible, strong, and healthy, and we need that flexibility to maintain a range of motion in the joints and keep our body moving. We don’t know for you guys but we wanna become sexy and healthy grandmas!

• Food:

  Big foodies here! We are both from France, so let us tell you that you how much food means to us. France has a fabulous culinary reputation and it is for a reason: french cuisine is all about flavors, forget about salt and sugar, we are talking about explosion of aromas. We learnt to educate our palate, so when we try exquisite food, it can feel like non-sexual orgasms.
  

• Makeup (Juliette writing):

  I associate sensuality with femininity and confidence. Makeup has always been a great tool for that in my opinion. I have fun with it by creating different looks depending on how I feel. It makes me feel confident, stylish, like I have my life in order.

• Twerk (Fanny here):

  Twerking was my most recent sensual discovery. I always wanted to learn this dance, mostly to have fun but also because I like testing things that are not well accepted in our society, things that can seem provocative. I took one class and I was on my butt -french expression to say it blew my mind- :). I would have never expected to fall in love with it. You put all your energy and movement around your hips which makes you feel so powerful and sexy.

Now you just have to go for it!

“I never thought that sex was wrong, sinful, dirty. When you take away the thought of things being dirty or forbidden, then you can really enjoy your sensuality.” Gioconda Belli

We see sensuality as a way to experience a deep peace with ourselves, to feel alive and fulfill. So if you embrace it, it makes you feel like you can do anything.

The world become your oyster.

And guess what?! When you feel like you can do anything, you actually start doing stuff that make you happy and 100% yourself. It is like a magical kick in the bum!

You know what, let's make it a little challenge: find a new way to bring your sensuality to the next level, before the end of the month.

It does not matter the activity you are using to grow that sensual side of yours (sexuality, dance, food, …), the most important thing is to do it for YOU.

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Boudoir Photography = a step back from feminism?

One of our first radio interview covered the relationship bewteen boudoir photography and feminism. A sociologist was brought on board to discuss the impact on publishing your boudoir photos online and she had a pretty strong opinion about it (even though we do not agree with it, we believe it is important to listen to other's point of view and understand why people can think differently).

If you'd like to watch the interview and read the article (in French), it's here.

A quick reminder.

We won't go over in details why you should do a boudoir session (because we did it here) but to recap, we think that the best reason to do it is because you want to treat and/or challenge yourself. It is the perfect opportunity to showcase your confidence, welcome your true self and slam the door on everything that has held you back.

Posting sexy photos of yourself online = seeking attention?

During this interview, we were asked why our models were sharing their photos online. Our main argument is that, you Scandals post them because you are proud of them, and proud of yourself. The second argument is that, we do like receiving support from others. It feels nice to get positive comments from friends, family and sometimes strangers.

Every time our clients share their pictures from their session on social media, they get a lot of positive comments from people supporting the movement. They even inspire people to do a same or at least be more loving with their body.

If social media can get more positive messages and encouragement, we don't know about you but we are down!

The point of view expressed by the sociologist in this article was pretty concerning. From what we understood, she thinks the fact that more women want to show themselves in lingerie is risky and is not a way to claim our feminism. She adds:

"Why should every woman show themselves? I see it at a regressive phenomenon."

Not Ashamed.

By definition, feminism is wanting to get the same rights as men, period. We think that dragging feminism and politics in this interview didn't make much sense with boudoir to begin with. We are assuming the idea behind it was that, as women, we cannot expect to be taken as seriously if we were to post sexy pictures of ourselves online.

Boudoir photography is getting more and more popular for one reason: women (and men!) are finally saying "screw it" to inaccessible beauty standards and are encouraging self love and acceptance.

Boudoir is a way to celebrate yourself, why would you hide it? Don't get us wrong, you have every right to keep your photos private. But you also have the right to share them without losing points in the feminism column.

Less professional because of boudoir?

If you have been following us for a little while, you must have seen that we are mainly using ourselves for our advertising, in lingerie, and even tasteful nudity.

Does that make us look less professional to you? Do you even remember it when you see us face to face? No. What sticks is the message behind it: you can do whatever the hell you want.

The other photographer, Sarah, says at the end of the video that she admires women who share their photos online because it motivates others to do the same and will become more and more normal.

“We don't have to worry about what people think because it does not define who we are.” she added.

Man, we cannot agree more! You are not less professional because of your boudoir photos. It has absolutely nothing to do with your work performance, the way you interact with people, or whether you like broccoli or not. If anything, you were just brave enough to openly say you are proud of yourself.

You do not need to explain your choices to others. Do a boudoir shoot if that makes you happy, share your pictures with the world if you want to… At the end of the day YOU are the only one who decide what is the best for your beautiful self!

And if you don't feel ready (yet!) to do a boudoir shoot with a professional, then start with an homemade one. We have created a fully detailed online program so you can take your own pictures with just your cellphone, at home, in your own time. This is the perfect opportunity to get familiar with the boudoir photography world!

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How tantric sex coach Pamela Horner reclaimed her power - Scandaleuse X Shedoesthecity

Let us introduce you to the powerful Pamela Horner, a Tantric Sexual Empowerment Coach who wants to help people have “epic orgasms” (put your hands up you wanna learn… we sure do!).

This article is part of our collaboration with She Does The City & Womanizer, in which we help them feature fierce AF womxn in boudoir photo shoots.

“As a woman in recovery for sexual trauma, Pamela’s journey to get to where she is today is both harrowing and inspiring. She has spent a lot of time healing from her past, and now directs her energy to helping other people reclaim their sexuality.

”I made it my mission to help people reclaim their inner God/Goddess in order to own their power and pleasure.” 

The work she does with clients help them gain confidence in all facets of their lives.

Gorgeous is one word we’d use to describe Pamela’s photos, but they also exude a warm and peaceful energy—a sense of ease. A fascinating person with a generous heart, we were curious to get to know Pamela more…

How would you describe your sexuality?

I would describe my sexuality as bi-sexual.

How did you reclaim your power?

I discovered that sexual power was the key to feeling alive, confident, magical, and it even helped me make money. When I figured out how to use this power for good, to help people reawaken their most shamed, neglected lost parts, everything started to transform not only for me, for my clients as well.

I literally went from wanting to end my life, feeling numb, worthless and empty to feeling powerful, magical, radiant and influential, able to command the love, relationships and income that I desired. 

What is tantric sex, exactly?

Tantra is about connection and presence… it isn’t inherently about sex, but its teachings allow you to see and experience deep pleasure in the present moment and transmit that feeling to another, if you so choose. It helps you to reconnect to deeper levels of bliss.

Sounds amazing, how do you help people get there? 

I help people step into their power through one on one coaching. Everyone is born powerful, but along the way we receive messages that we are ‘less than’. We can fake confidence for most of the time, but in heightened states of vulnerability—like sex—there is nowhere to hide. This is where a lack of power can show up as a lack of arousal, or not being able to ask for what you want—feeling unfulfilled, or even uninterested in pleasure. 

I truly believe that the reason that people don’t have the love, money, or pleasure that they want is because their mind and nervous system believe that it is unsafe for them to expand beyond what is familiar. This is really deep work but when you are able to access the primal self, diving into the deepest level of your unconscious mind, you can experience radical change in your life.

What types of people do you help through your Tantric Sexual Empowerment coaching?

My clients are typically successful entrepreneurs that know they are destined for so much more. They’ve had moments of being so close only to find that there is something they are missing… that something is the connection to their deepest most hypnotic power – sexual power.

What advice do you wish to give your younger self?

As long as you are trying to seek approval, you will never taste true power. True power exists within you and you have always had it.

Happiness, desire, pleasure and delightful deviousness are all a part of your true essence. The only way to hold onto these things is by diving into yourself, getting to know yourself, and understanding that loving yourself is not something anyone would ever look back on and say “I wish I didn’t do that”.

Also, I love you, you are a fierce fucking warrior Goddess and you are here to turn the world on.”

Curious to learn more about Pamela? Follow her on Instagram at @theawakenedaphrodite. See more of our Womanizer x Sheoesthecity boudoir shoots here.“.

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Painful intimate conditions we should talk about more.

If I had the opportunity to read the following blog post when I was in my darkest time, it would have made me feel a lot less lonely. Maybe it would have allowed me to heal faster. So I hope this will help you.

Here goes: I have had UTIs and vaginal infections for as long as I can remember. Here is the fun part: everytime there is no bacteria, nothing "wrong" medically speaking to justify them. Stress-triggered apparently. 

I went through years of medical tests to find nothing. I wasn't even taken seriously half the time. There is nothing much online besides telling me to shove cranberries down my throat and eat probiotics. No guidance, no help. 

"Most women get those".

It is damn true: every single time I have mentioned it to a woman, she also shared her own intimate struggle with me too. It's like we all suffer in silence.

But just because most of us have to deal with annoying conditions like these doesn't mean it should be swept under the carpet and not spoken about.

Those conditions can make you spiral so bad and end up seriously affecting your everyday life. For years, that's all I could think about. Every time symptoms start to show up (as recently as last month), this vicious cycle of fear that I am screwed for the rest of my life and that it will never go away begins. 

Do I follow the basic " how to avoid-UTIs” starter pack? Please, if there was a competition for the best users, I'd probably win. No douching, pick the right underwear, drink tons of water, pee after sex, nothing too tight, all of those have been part of my daily routine forever.

So yeah, a few weeks ago after a few months of peace, right on my birthday, boom, it began again. I started with the medical consultation, got antibiotics I probably didn't need, and it made it worse.

During a late night internet search with hope to find some relief, I came across some comments from women such as "I have been dealing with these for 40 years". And it hit me: there is NO WAY in hell I will have to struggle for decades. 

Obviously, my intimate adventures are due to something going on beyond a physical level. It's a way for my body to handle stress or even share a message with me. Better start trying to find another approach. 

The quest of alternative solutions. 

A little disclaimer here: I know my body pretty well as I started having bacteria-free UTIs when I was 6 years old. Everything I share here is based on my own experience. Don't avoid medical attention in your case unless you are 100% sure of what you are doing.

Here is what I used to do:

• Panic google search any type of condition or remedies to try to put a label on it

• Not talk about it because I was ashamed of it and thought I could handle the spiralling alone. 

• Being angry at my body for f*cking up.

• Being scared of sex. More particularly pain during sex and fearing that I would disappoint my partner. So naturally, I left him out of what I was going through.

Here is what I tried this time, after breaking down:

• Noticing patterns: when did I feel the worse symptoms? I noticed they usually didn't show up when I was distracted or busy. Good point.

• Talked to my partner. Guess what, he understood. Of course he freaking did. 

• Freaking breathe. I made relaxation a priority a little bit more every day by stretching, meditating, working out, anything that simply felt right. 

But the most interesting thing I tried this time: I treated myself to a healing session with a Reiki practitioner.

Last year, I started reading more and more about alternative healing, the role of energies and the Universe. While I don't believe in everything I read, I kind of take whatever feels right to me. 

During the healing session, I asked Tiffany, the healer, to focus on this area of my body, to see if maybe she saw blocages or could get any guidance. And it got very interesting. A lot of useful information came out of this session, but I think the biggest one that clicked in my brain was when she talked about my balance between masculine and feminine energy.

Masculine VS Feminine energy

To explain it simply: each of us have both masculine and feminine energy. Just like the Yin and the Yang, they complete one another.

The masculine energy is more about "doing", being square and on a mission to accomplish things. The feminine energy is about "being", flowing through life, living your emotions. 

Backstory: I have always been a very controlling person. I am a planner, I am super rational and a goal achiever. To-do lists are my jam. I need structure to avoid stress, or so I thought.

What Tiffany saw during my session was that my feminine energy was tiny compared to my masculine energy which was acting like a bodyguard to protect me. Guess what is the center of the feminine energy in women? Pelvic area. Bladder, womb, vagina.

The conclusion was that since my masculine energy was off the chart, my feminine one had no choice but "firing up" down there to show its presence. By learning to let go and surrender, I could start healing myself.

Note that I was pretty much bawling my eyes out on that table, I had no doubt that this revelation was true.

The good news? Tapping into your feminine energy is super fun. It's all about not planning, indulging, going with the flow, moving around, being creative. I also tried Yin Yoga, which is supposed to help you reconnect with this specific energy and I couldn't believe the positive impact it's had on me. I also read this article that was pretty helpful (note the #7 of the list by the way eheh)

I started giving myself a break and forgiving me for thinking my body was doing something wrong.

When I start feeling pain, I take a moment to recenter, take a deep breath and let my feminine energy know that I hear her, she is safe, I am safe, and I am here for her. I tell myself that I am letting go, I relax my jaw (automatically, that's where I start tensing up). And it works. It just freaking works. Slowly, the symptoms disappear and I have spent my first few days in MONTHS symptoms free. 

Honestly, I am proud of myself for going out of my way to learn more about me. I'm getting close to my 30's and thought I knew myself 1000%. Turns out I didn't and I like what I am learning now. 

If you have been dealing with UTIs, yeast infections, intimate pains… know that you are not alone. Know that you can find relief. You may have to try different things before finding something that works. Follow your instinct for what YOU think is good for YOU. 

Looking to try the healing session I did? Reach out to Tiffany here!

Take control of your self-image

Originally written for The Beach Psychotherapy in Toronto

We never see ourselves the way we really are. And that could be okay if we didn’t have a tendency to turn towards negative feelings about our own image. Let’s be real, rare are the people who don’t fall into self-criticism.

Three years ago when we started Scandaleuse Photography, we didn’t know how much we would help women struggling with their self-perception. Women that can’t stand looking in the mirror and end up avoiding them at all costs. Women who think they are never good enough or who got their self-respect stolen from them. Women who feel stuck, who lack the amazing feeling of accomplishment that gives you butterflies and the motivation to keep growing and improving.

Because the relationship you have with yourself starts on the physical aspect and can impact everything else in your life.

Your femininity is a source of positive energy you need to tap into.

First things first: you are not alone. At least 1 out 5 Canadian women are not happy with the way they look. That is huge. There is a certain pressure society lays out for us that implies, or rather screams at us, that the definition of beauty is to be thin and flawless. Seeing this very day, It is very difficult not to compare yourself to these standards and feel miserable if you think you don’t match them.

You are your best ally and your worst enemy. Getting in touch with yourself is essential for a positive mind growth and it starts with celebrating your own kind of beauty and femininity, your way.

That’s right, your version of being feminine. Because there isn’t just one perfect way, you can twist it and morph it making it your own.

Let us tell you a little story. When we photographed Lea, she told us she refused to see herself as attractive. She could see it through her partners’ eyes, but couldn’t believe it from her own perspective. Through her session, she finally managed to see that she was beautiful with every aspect of her body. Things she had considered “flaws” such as, “her asymmetrical breasts, soft belly, cellulite and hair”

Sometimes you need to see yourself from another pair of eyes to ditch the distorted image you have of yourself.

If you have one day in which you feel even a tiny bit good about yourself, channel it 500% and use it as a constant strength. Because while we all have moments when we feel not so good about ourselves, we also have days when, hey, we’re actually okay. It could be as simple as having a good hair day or a little success like changed that light bulb that had been burnt out for months. Take this feeling, hold it tight and nurture the hell out of it.

Take Katie as an example, a lovely woman with a physical disability. She decided to not let this get it the way and to celebrate her true self. It started slowly, one step at a time with a better diet and focusing on improving her range of motion. She put herself on a good path, wanting to make of her goals come true: showing it to the world. That’s when she called us. She said it herself “I am ready to challenge what people expect. You are not invisible, you are worthy.”

What about when someone stole and damaged your self-love?

This is Erica’s story. Erica suffered from the hatred of a man, a family member for years. While she managed to escape, it wasn’t without consequences: this experience completely destroyed her self-esteem. She told us she didn’t have control of her own image anymore. We met completely randomly and she gathered the courage to challenge herself with a boudoir session.

It wasn’t easy. We saw her shake, hesitate and even tear up but she did it. Posing in front of the lens made her realize that the qualities she was admiring in others were also part of her.

She was able to win back what she thought was gone forever and shout out to the whole world “I will never feel ashamed to be me anymore.”

This feeling of accomplishment is a great push to keep going, you end up craving it and you’ll do anything to keep creating and experiencing it.

The truth is: once you get the courage to show yourself and vulnerable in lingerie in front of “strangers”, you’re left with an empowering feeling of “I can do anything”.  Everyone needs to challenge themselves on different levels. It makes you want to keep going, it helps you grow and become more assertive, thus more confident. You end up creating a cycle of positive vibes which will lead you to move mountains.

Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend, because after all, YOU are your best friend. If there is one thing you need to take away from this post is that you only have one body and one mind; it’s YOURS to make use out of it.

If you feel like spending time with us on a Sunday morning with pastries & coffee, join us on March 22nd for our new workshop “A guide to trusting yourself” ! Sign up below to get the deets!

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How facing your body image can help your personal growth

While the personal development and body-positivity movements are growing everywhere online, rare are the people truly at peace with their bodies. Hell, can we even be comfortable with how we look 100% of the time? We don't think so. But for some of us, it gets to a level of maximum ignorance. You dodge mirrors as much as possible, you don't "waste time" putting thoughts into your looks, after all, you have other mountains to conquer, you want to grow, and that happens in the mind right?

But what if we told you that no matter how much work you put into climbing those mountains, you will end up stuck at some point in your growth, your search of happiness, if you don't connect with your body?

If you want to feel completely fulfilled, you will have to also prioritize your connection with your body. No need to read a zillion miracle morning books and start random routines just yet if you can't face yourself to begin with. 

Do you recognize yourself in one or more of the following situations:

Avoiding your reflection

You're a master at avoiding to look at any type of reflection in your everyday life. Mirrors are just a practical thing for you to make sure you have nothing stuck in your teeth, but it doesn't go beyond. Frankly, it just makes you uncomfortable to look at yourself, so just like an ostrich, you would rather dig your head in the sand rather than having to deal with our own image.

You look, but it just makes you sad. 

Nothing is good enough with you. You're not this enough, or too much of that. Maybe you are even ashamed, or embarrassed about your physical appearance. You spend your time comparing yourself to others or even older versions of yourself.  

Worrying too much about your appearance is just superficial or even narcissistic.

Looks are not everything, you don't need to impress anyone after all. Overall, you think you are pretty neutral about your appearance. You do the bare minimum because you have to, but that's pretty much it. 

Let's be honest: if you are not facing your own image and simply looking at yourself, it's not because it's so much fun like a day in the park. You're avoiding it because it hurts to do so. 

So if any of these situations speak to you, it is time to change.

What happens if you don't connect with your body:

Can you grow? Yes. You can start setting yourself up for whatever you wish you to become or do. But here is the catch: you can only grow to a certain extent and you will get stuck at some point. 

To break it down easily, if you are not literally facing yourself because any situation stated above and if you are not taking the time to make peace with your body, you are telling yourself that on some level, that you are just not good enough or not worth it. This often happens completely unconsciously, which makes it even more sneakier. And what happens when we think we are not good enough? We deny ourselves opportunities because we don't believe we will be up for them anyway. 

In conclusion, by not connecting with your body, you are setting limiting beliefs for yourself. Again, that can be completely unconscious. 

Time to get real (you can do this!)

Let's rip off the band-aid right here: you can't avoid yourself forever. You only have one body carrying you through life and you are responsible for it. If you tend to be negative about it, it will make you pay one way or another. Plenty of studies have shown that negativity directed towards yourself and your body can lead to health risks in the long term. Better start giving yourself some lovin'! 

When you look good, you feel good.

While some of us think it is superficial to focus on your looks, we think there is a lot of untapped power by not doing so. Wearing your favourite clothes, getting dolled up, taking care of your skin, moving your body… all of these create a powerful feeling of being unstoppable. Why not tap into that as much as we can? Don't forget, this is about YOU, not others. All of the decisions regarding your preferred options about your appearance belong only to you.

You don't have to impress anyone. 

That is true, but you should try impress yourself. Taking care of your relation with your body and taking actions for it should not be about other people. It should be for your own sake, to your own standards. And even more so, you should create your own validation and not depend on others. I had a very poor sense of self-worth until the first time I fell in love. My boyfriend back in the day saw what I couldn't see: that I am a freaking beautiful person. I was over the moon until the relationship ended. All of that self-worth built through this left with him and I had to start again from square one. It took me a heartbreak to start building my self-worth by myself, for myself. Validation from others is a temporary good feeling, it doesn't stick. At the end of the day, you are the person you spend the most time with.

You are not alone

• Raise your hand if you have ever looked at old pictures of yourself and thought "wow, I thought I was so much fatter/thinner back then that I actually was!". 

• Keep your hand up if you have ever heard coming from others that you are not seeing yourself the way you really are.

• Don't get a cramp, but hold that hand high if you have ever beaten yourself up over flaws you think you have, beyond rationality.

Well, welcome to the club of body-dysmorphia: being incapable of visually seeing your body the way it actually is. For some of us, it can become obsessive and very challenging in life. We strongly suggest to read this article if you think you may suffer from body-dysmorphia. 

Learning to embrace who you fully are is the best gift you can ever give to yourself. 

This is how you develop your own trust and how you stand up for yourself. You owe it to yourself to create the path towards who you want to become.

Take some time to reflect, be grateful for this body of yours, supporting you everyday. Nourish and strengthen it the way it needs. You will see that it will remove SO many blocks you didn't even know you had, and make more room for all of these beautiful ideas hidden in the back. And if you need a little bit of help, we are here for you…

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