Why boudoir photos are a great Christmas gift

Don't get us wrong, a boudoir shoot should definitely be done for yourself before anything. It's your chance to get quality "me-time”, try something new, and more importantly: reconnect with your body the way you want. But, if you feel like it, sharing your boudoir images with your special someone is a beautiful, genuine gift that's hard to top!

You're showing a version of yourself your partner might not know.

God knows this is hard, especially when you've been with someone for a long time and have built a life together. Many of our clients have shared with us that their partner did not expect them to ever do a boudoir shoot and how much of a "wow”factor it was when they told them. It was even more special to them, like they were let in on a little sexy secret.

Or... you're showing them the "You" they haven't seen in a while.

While it is hard to find new things about each other, it is even harder to step away from your role within your family. The care-taker, the parent, you-name-it… When a routine is established, we don't get many chances to let our sexy selves shine. That's everything boudoir is about: stepping out of your daily tasks and bringing some spice back!

It's not a "boring” gift.

Getting socks and underwear is useful, but we bet your partner would take risqué photos of yourself instead in a heartbeat! Sharing boudoir photos is so meaningful because it is exclusive, vulnerable and genuine. Chances are nobody else but you two will see them, and that makes it extra special.

It's also a gift for yourself (eheh)

Talk about the ultimate win-win situation: you get to experience an empowering, liberating moment and get a confidence boost in the process, and your partner gets a reminder of how beautiful their special someone is. And it doesn't stop there! Boudoir has many wonderful long-lasting effects that will without a doubt affect your happiness on the positive.

As you can tell, if you are looking for a great way to impress your partner and share something truly meaningful with them, look no further: your boudoir photos will do the trick.

And what a good timing that is when we've set up the perfect boudoir experience for the holidays with our Boudoir Under The Tree special!

Click on the button below to enjoy a discounted mini session and more.

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Finding sensuality in winter time

Winter is coming with its Christmas’ vibe… and we are very excited about it! In our opinion winter in Canada is magical (well at least when the snow is still white instead of being covered with pollution) ❄️.

The problem with winter here is that it last for a longgg timeee. So many months of cold and grey(ish) weather can easily affects us in a negative way and make us fall in a poor self-care never ending circle. Which, you can guess, is hard on the feeling of being sensual.

If you want to live your life in the most happiest way possible, it is really important to take good care of your body and mind. In order to do so, you have to put yourself as a priority. Otherwise you let all the stress from your everyday routine take control of your well being. This is when anxiety, fatigue, fear (and all that jazz) show the tip of their nose.

So why is sensuality so important?

It helps to feel in harmony with our body, which increases our self-confidence. And since sensuality is connected to all of our senses, it also develops our creativity, imagination and intuition.

We know sensuality can be a scary word, as a lot of people think it is only related to sexuality. But it is not! Sensuality is the ability to feel in touch with all of our senses.

Here are 5 ways to feel sensual again in winter time:

Movement

We put this on top of our list because this is VERY important, not only for sensuality but also for your health. So write it down somewhere or take a mental note:

You have to incorporate movements in your routine!

Being “stuck inside", having to work from home and spending most of our days sitting on a chair or a sofa is really bad for our body. It makes our muscles week, creates tightness in our back and neck, and decreases our level of energy.

if you motivate yourself to move your body often during the day, your productivity and mood will skyrocket. And honestly it is an easy habit to create. For example:

• Do some yoga in the morning and gentle stretching during the day.

• Take a break from work and dance like nobody's watching.

  Or just move your body slowly and the way you want it, without making it pretty.

Moving your body will make you feel more connected to it and at peace with yourself.

Self-Care

Taking care of this body of yours is also primordial. We like to imaging our body is its own little person that needs attention, the same way you will give it to a loved one, a pet or a plant. It needs love and care in order to grow strong and beautiful. Here is how you can give it some lovin’:

• Put some make up on and do your hair if it makes you feel good.

• Make yourself a hot bath or get massage to relax.

• Take the time to moisturize every inches of your skin and feel the lotion deeply nourishing it.

Food

Yes, believe us when we say food as the power to develop your sensuality. There is a common saying french people like to say after a delicious meal:

“It was as good as an orgasm!”

It does not mean we had one while eating, but it means the feeling of peace and joy was the same an orgasm can give you. Quality food is all about flavours. Forget about salt and sugar, we are talking about explosion of aromas that can increase your level of happiness and peace :)

• Learn to cook healthy and tasty meals.

• Go buy yourself some delicious french pastries.

• Order your favourite food and take the time to enjoy each flavours.

Sexuality

Even if sensuality is not only about sex, it is an important part of it. In this part we want to talk about self-sexuality and forget about potential partners for a minute.

You have to know your body by heart in order to feel fully at peace with it. You cannot be afraid to touch and look at it, and discover what parts of your body are the most sensitive.

They are so many ways to play with and learn about your body, and by yourself. You can start by lighting up some candles, listen to musics that help you relax or turn you on… it will put you in the mood. Once you have set up everything your way, you can try different things, such as:

• Breathing exercises and energy movements (this is a bit more spiritual) to help you reconnect with your body.

• Touch EVERY PARTS of your body, apply different types of pressure or speed. This will help you understand where and how you like to be touched.

• Be curious about toys (yes even if you have a partner, it can actually be a cool add on to your sex life). You can find a variety of toys: static or with vibrations; different sizes, shapes, colours and texture.

*Little side note: if you are looking to empower your sexuality, we highly suggest to check out Layla Martin work!

And of course boudoir!

Last but definitely not least on today’s list is boudoir photography. This is the perfect experience to discover and play with your sensuality during a time that is for you and you only! No need to wear a disguise for your shoot, you are the one choosing the vibes you want to create and will bring the outfits and props that make you feel your most sensual-self.

Of course there are so many other ways to embrace your sensuality, you just have to experience and be curious.

Now you know what to do, go make sensuality part of your everyday routine!

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How words can impact your mind and body

Language is a powerful tool which brings people together and help understand each other. But unfortunately it can also be used as a weapon when put between mischievous hands. Since it is easier for a lot of people to criticize rather than giving compliments, words can be extremely harmful.

By the way I, Fanny, am writing this blog. But I can also speak for Juliette as she also got hurt from people’s comments when she was younger!

Like most people I am lacking self-confidence from time to time. Not about my body, more about my skills and intellect (this will be for another blog though 😬). I feel very fortunate I was able to accept and love how my body looks like naturally, but it wasn't always the case! It took me many years to realize that all the beauty standards I grew up with were BS and how to reclaim my own beauty. Honestly photography helped a lot and I am really glad I chose that path!

I used to wish to be curvier, taller, have thicker wrists, have a perfect skin… I was wishing to be different not only because of what I was seeing in magazines or tv, but also because people around me were criticizing me about my body.

When your loved ones are not so loving

Juliette was criticized for being overweight, I was criticized for being skinny and short:

-“You look like a garden gnome hahaha!”

- “I should not talk about that in front of you! What are you, 14 or so?” (I was 22 😢)

- “Are you not ashamed of not having boobs?”

- “Are you sure you don't suffer from anorexia?”

… I could keep going on and on.

Most of those awful sentences came from friends or people I knew, and every time they broke me into thousand pieces. Until a classmate told me the worst one someone could ever say to me “your mom should be so ashamed for giving birth to an anorexic girl. What an embarrassment!”.

That sentence was a wake up call! Like Juliette, I had a “F**k that! Never again” moment and told myself that I will never let words put me down ever again.

Relax, it was just a joke!

That famous: “I was joking!”… I am pretty sure we can all relate right? And maybe we did it too without realizing we hurt someone. We don’t know if it was the same for you but Juliette and I grew up in France where sarcasm is very common. People from the same family and friends pocked each other, made jokes about the way they look or their personality, and ended up with a "you are so sensitive, it was just a joke!” if the person was hurt or taking it the wrong way. We were both victims of those comments that could be soul crushing.

And yes maybe it was just a “joke”, but for some reason that day those words sticked to your mind. Maybe it wasn’t the first time you heard those words or maybe you were already having a bad day and was feeling a down. When a loved one tells you several times how overweight they think you are or how an idiot you can look like, even if they say it with a touch of humour, you ended up believing those words and less in yourself.

When the critics come from yourself!

Raise your hand if you have ever called yourself stupid. Raise your hand if you have ever looked at your reflection in the mirror with a disgusted look on your face. Raise your hand if you have ever been unkind to yourself! Are you raising both hands right now and need a third one? Yep, me as well :(

Self-criticism is so common! It is very easy to be harsh with our body and our mind, yet the things we tell ourselves we would never tell that to someone else. So why this need of self-harm and sabotage?

What we want you to do from now on is to talk to yourself the same way you would talk to your best friend.

Start seeing your body as a friend who needs love instead of seeing it as an enemy. Kindness is not only meant to comfort others!

It is hard to detach ourselves from the negative things people can tell us or have told us in the past because it is painful. But the truth is that people have the tendency to project their own insecurities on you rather than dealing with their problems. So the next time someone criticize you, remember there is a big chance that person is just showing how they really think about themselves in a specific situation.

Once you get that, people’s hurtful words will not affect you anymore!

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We made it on CTV!

Let us tell you a powerful story. A story full of dreams, love, and connections, that started 6 years ago when we opened Scandaleuse. Opening our business in a new country and in a new language was already a success for us, but wanted more.

We wanted to create a safe space for our clients to be their most magnificent-self, and also create meaningful and long-lasting connections between our Scandals and us. We were dreaming of being interviewed at the radio, on newspaper, and even one day making an appearance on national tv to really spread the word about all the great benefits from doing a boudoir shoot.

You can guess that those dreams don’t happened magically over night! We pushed ourselves out of our comfort zone so many times! Between going to tons of events and start conversations with strangers (if you are wondering how to network with someone without sounding too salesy, always start with an honest compliment on something they wear. This works every time 😉), making videos even though we felt so frustrated and uncomfortable talking in front of a camera, or all the new things we had to learn… We worked hard to meet people, create useful content, and build our brand! Not that we are done achieving everything on our list, but so far all of this hard worked payed off: we build a beautiful community and great reputation, we can pay ourselves a good salary, and we have the freedom to create.

We don’t just believe in ourselves

There is also something important to know about Juliette and I, we both are spiritual. We believe that everything happens for a reason and always try to manifest the things we want. Why are we mentioning that? Well, do you remember those interviews we mentioned previously? Every time we wrote down in our journals that we wanted to be interviewed, it happened!

The only one that was hard to manifest was the national TV appearance 😬. We were dreaming of it for a long time but it is possible that, deep down, we thought it was just a dream. Until it happens… We finally made it on TV 🎉

And you know, it is probably for the best it took 6 years to happen because even if it was a fabulous experience it was also nerve-wracking! The idea of speaking in another language live on national TV, made us feel really nervous. If there is something we learnt in our spiritual journey is that things don’t happen if you are not ready for them.

It was meant to be

During Covid we did a bunch of shoots in order to raise money to save one of our loft. This is when we met Aakriti (she did one of the shoots) who is a segment producer for the live show called The Social on CTV. She also posed for us last year for an exhibit we did against domestic abuse. She really loved those two boudoir experience that she decided to pitch the topic to the channel and they accepted! We are so grateful for her ❤️

On our side we were able to talk to her about Michelle Osbourne who is a body activist and a past client, as they wanted to have another speaker during the show. What a pleasure it was to share another amazing conversation with Michelle!

We were also very pleased to have Cai and Hallae with us during the shoot so they could have the opportunity to talk about their experience and how boudoir photography impacted their life!

Cherry on top of the cake, we did not know that one of our friend, Marny (that we met during a mastermind) would be the audience coordinator that day, and Jam Gamble (another past client) will be there as well.

Everything came in full circle!

What was it all about?

The concept was for the channel to follow us on a shoot to see the all process of a boudoir shoot, from the prepping of the client to the selection of the final photographs, with the shoot in between. And have some interviews from two past clients as well as Sarah who was our client for the day:

Then a few weeks later we were invited for one of The Social show’s segment to talk more about sensuality and empowerment for women:

You cannot see it in the video but we were all nervous when we sat down. Then we started to talk with the hosts and everything became so natural. The energy in the room was so positive, and the public was really receptive. It really helped us to feel at ease! We hope to be able to do it again in the future.

Doing some public speaking to give our opinion about sensuality and body empowerment is part of our mission. The more we can talk about how boudoir photography is an amazing way to reconnect with your body and how therapeutic it can be for a lot of people, the happiest we feel!

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6 unusual inquiries we got for boudoir photography

Once upon a time, two boudoir photographers were having tasty breakfast together. And like most of new entrepreneurs, they decided to open their emails to check on new inquiries like they did every morning. That day they got a new one and happily started to read it, but their joy faded away when they saw the email attachment: a dick pic… They never opened their emails in the morning ever again 😂

We receive a lot of badass and emotional emails, but from time to time creepy and unusual requests are popping up. Some are hilarious, others are disturbing. 

Scandals, here is our top 6 of the weirdest inquiries we got since we opened Scandaleuse Photography:

N°6 : The dick pic guy

If there is something intriguing with Boudoir and men, is that most of the gentlemen who contact us for a boudoir shoot want to do something more sexual. Which is not a problem! Even if we do not shoot this type of photography we understand everyone has their own fantasies and there is nothing wrong with that. But what is the most disturbing for us is that some men believe we need to see their pee-pee before accepting to work with them. And it usually goes like this:

- Them: “I wanna shoot with you, do you need to see what I look like?”

- Us: “No need to! We do not chose our clients based on their look or body type.”

- Them: sending the picture of big Willy and the twins (with the worst angle and lighting) even thought we said no 😤 But if you really want to show us your joystick, at least do it in an artistic way!

Joke aside, here is a gentle reminder to anyone who want to send us pictures of their genital: just don’t, we really don’t need to see what you look like down there!

It was very tempting to add a moustache and a hat on this photograph and send it back to that particular client. Should we do it next time?

N°5 : The iPad guy

This made us laugh!

We received a long time ago an email from a guy who wanted to shoot one of his sexual fantasy with us, we don’t remember exactly what it was about. With his inquiry he attached a script of all the scenarios he had in mind, scene by scene with details of what we had to shoot (was it badly written on top of being weird? Absolutely!).

But wait, the best part was that he requested that we shoot only with is iPad. Go figure!

N°4 : The pink blouse guy

One day we were contacted by a man who wanted to do a boudoir shoot for his future husband. His idea was to lay down on a bed made of Kleenex - once again everyone has a fantasy. He was also looking for a wedding photographer but didn't want to tell us the date of the wedding - RED FLAG. The icing on the cake was when he asked us to wear pink blouses for the first meeting, because (and we quote) "the first impression is very important".

Sure! Do you want us to wear a french maid outfit so we can clean your discourtesy off your face? 

We nicely told him we would not do it, so he decided to go with another photographer and apparently found one… Good for him!

N° 3 : The "I like humiliation" guy

This one was probably the most recent one. We received an email from a guy who lost a bet and had to do a boudoir shoot, wearing high heels, sexy dress, lingerie and/or be nude. He had to walk like a model and be shoot in some very embarrassing poses, for his humiliation and women amusement.

We obviously declined, told him boudoir photography is an art, and that we work only with people who respect this type of photography.

But we added we could provide some headshots for professional purpose if he was interested. You have to see business opportunity everywhere right?!

N° 2 : The "you need to wear sexy clothes so I can feel turned on" guy

Ooooh man, this was our first weird inquiry. This married man sent us an email because he was looking to do a couple boudoir shoot with his wife. They have been married for 20 years and they were looking to spice up their relationship. We were pretty happy about it since, at that time, we didn't get a lot of couples interested by a boudoir shoot. So he started to explain what he wanted, sent us example of videos and pictures (remember the dick pic story previously, well those were the beginning). His wife had apparently a big and sexual appetite and they were looking for erotic photography. We explained to him this is not the type of service we offer but we could give them sensual pictures without crossing our boundaries.

We were not against working with them, they wanted to celebrate the love they have for each other by trying a new experience.

Unfortunately he crossed the line when he asked us to dress up very sexy during the shoot so he can be more excited. We were happy to not go forward with this inquiry: this couple were the lions, we were the gazelles. 

N° 1: The "let's redo American Pie" guy

And the winner is... (actually my little favourite, probably because I watch all of the American Pie movies)
A man who loved his mom decided to treat her with a boudoir shoot and reach out to us. What a sweet and thoughtful gentleman who was open minded enough to offer this beautiful experience as a gift for his mom. Or so we thought.

We were pretty intrigued so we replied to him asking for more details. Maybe his mom asked him to book the shoot for her, maybe it was a gift for his parents' wedding anniversary, or maybe his mom had self-confidence issues and he wanted to let her out.

We were so wrong, it was not a thoughtful idea but a pretty crazy one:

He wanted some pictures taken of his mom and his best-friend like the scene in the first “American Pie” when Paul Finch is having sex on the pool table with Stifler’s mom. The story never said if it was a spam or a serious request. 

Yes we are photographers whose main goal is to highlight the beauty and sensuality of every bodies, but it doesn't mean we get sexual pleasure out of it. So keep your pants on (at least until the day of the shoot)! We are not part of your fantasy, don't plan to be, and will never ever touch your purple-helmeted warrior of love.  

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I do whatever I want with my butt, thank you.

A few weeks ago, I received a comment on one of my pole-dancing Instagram stories with a very thoughtful question:

“Why are you doing this? The way you have to show your butt to everyone… What is the point? I just don’t get it.”

Did someone call Judgment to the table? Many of us have a hard time starting facing judgement, especially when we want to start something new.. It is very easy for people to share their 2 cents on how you should live your life. While there is nothing much you can do about their behaviour, you can choose to handle the situation to your advantage.

Detach, to not waste your time.

So here I was, in my underwear, upside down on the pole, practicing a move, minding my own business. Then this message popped up and I started to wonder:

• Why am I upside down on a pole?

• Why am I half naked in my apartment?

• Why do I share those online?

And so on until my mind was filled with enough random thoughts about my actions to the point that they made me question my entire being.

Hold on a minute here.

This simple message had me doubting myself and my choices? It made me think twice about sharing something that I actually love and that doesn’t hurt anyone?

Hell no.

I realized I had three options. I could:

- Let my anger out and tackled him with my words (tempting!);
- Spend my time starting a debate on how we live in a society where it is inappropriate for women to show their bodies but normal for men and how it is important to change mentality around that topic, or;
- Ignore his remark and keep my cool.

I went for the 3rd option.

Why? Because what this guy wanted was to criticize, not try to really understand and potentially change his way of thinking and beliefs. Getting into a debate to attempt to educate him was very tempting but I just knew it would have just left me feeling frustrated as hell. So I kept my cool, told him I would not go into details and wished him a good night.

Sometimes, You can absolutely have conversations with people, only if they come from a neutral and curious state of mind. If someone starts saying something with an undertone of judgement, you will not make them change their minds.

So don’t waste your time, and keep doing whatever makes you feel good, especially because…

It’s not about you anyway.

There will always be someone ready to negatively judge whatever you're doing. And the truth is: it has nothing to do with you.

Behind someone’s judgment is an insecurity of theirs shining through.

And they are projecting it on you. You poked at something that is uncomfortable to them. It reminds them of that one thing they wish they could work on but haven’t yet for whatever reason. Is it fair? Nope. Do we all do it? Yes.

Being aware of it gives you the chance to act differently in those situations. It makes it easier to let go of the negativity you are facing and even bring compassion to the table by asking this person what is really going on. (If you feel like it, of course. Again, pick your battles!)

No, detaching doesn’t make you selfish.

A lot of people, especially women, feel incredibly guilty not to listen when someone is giving them “advice” disguised in judgement. That's conditioning for you, the “be a good girl” kind of thing. If this is your case, here is a little reminder that can help: nobody knows your life better than yourself, therefore, the only person who can make decisions about it is… you. It doesn't mean you have to send everyone packing and that you don't care. But it means you don't have to accept everything coming your way.

It does not make you selfish or pretentious if you decide to not give a damn. You know you cannot please everyone.

You want to wear only blue clothes, go for it. You don't want kids, nothing wrong with that. You want to work in the sex industry, you do you my friend (no pun intended - or maybe a little!).

Don't let others dictate who you are just because they believe it is the only and right way to be. What you do with your butt, how you dress, the way you live your life and who you decide to be are your decisions to make.

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Sensuality 101

Let's get liberated today!

Sensuality can be a scary topic for some people as it is common to believe it is only related to sex, and usually used as a weapon for seduction. Even if both are connected (when you learn to develop your sensuality, you learn to be in touch with your body the way it is, which opens up your sexuality), sensuality is also so much more than sex.

It is the ability to feel deeply connected to all our senses, and experience life in a more beautiful and energetic way.

It is time to demystify sensuality

If you Google it, you will read the common definition of sensuality is:

The enjoyment, expression, or pursuit of physical, especially sexual, pleasure.

But sensuality is also defined as the ability to feel in touch with our touch, smell, sight, hearing, taste and any extrasensory perceptions beyond our five commonly recognized senses.

If sensuality is often interpreted as sexuality, it is because of that one thing they have in common. PLEASURE. What can be more difficult to understand is this notion of pleasure: some things can give you sexual pleasure and others can be pleasurable without sexual desire.

Sensuality can increase your sexual behaviour but can also be about enjoying simple pleasures, such as watching a sunset, flavourful food, a massage, a perfume or any particular smell, a yoga pose, feeling the sun on your skin… Anything that makes you feel great in the moment but isn't related to sex.

You gotta embrace it!

As women we heard it all:

“Be polite. Dress up properly. Be a good girl!".

Most of us have been told to never be too loud because people will think we are hysterical. We have been told to not take too much room otherwise we are just showing off. Neither to show too much skin because we are whores if we do. So we cover ourselves up, forget how to be in touch with our femininity and let our true essence disappears. And for what? Because we feel like we have to please others all the time, and are afraid of people's judgment.

Not loving our whole-self enough leads to frustration, jealousy and sadness. How can we expect to be happy and live the life we want, when we are filled with all those negative feelings?

Learning to embrace sensuality (btw, we are all sensual beings!) is a way to start feeling in harmony with our body, which increases our self-confidence and trust in others. And since sensuality is connected to all of our senses, it also develops our creativity, imagination and intuition. Not that bad hey!

Sensuality = Femininity

It doesn't matter what we identify to, we all have a feminine and masculine side. Sensuality is a powerful tool to dig deeper into your feminine energy. If you feel like you are more in touch with your masculinity, exploring your sensuality will help you understand and bring back more of your feminine side into your life.

It is very easy to do! You will read below that there are many ways to embrace your sensuality, all you need is to keep an open mind about experiencing life.

Different ways to explore sensuality

When at peace with your whole-self, you are less likely to feel stressed in your every day life. You also don't feel the need of external validation: what people can think of you does not matter anymore. It creates a new level of self-love and confidence.

As said before, there many possibilities to experience sensuality:

• Movement:

  Can be some yoga, stretching, dance, a walk in nature,… Moving your body every day is amazing for so many aspects of your life, one of them being sensuality. When you move, you have to be aware of every inches of your body. Every muscles, and nerfs get activated, which makes you feel more in touch with yourself. It also allows you put all your energy around your hips which makes you feel so powerful and sexy.

• Food:

  Big foodies here! We are both from France, so let us tell you that you how much food means to us. France has a fabulous culinary reputation and it is for a reason: french cuisine is all about flavours and smells, forget about salt and sugar, we are talking about explosion of aromas. We learnt to educate our palate, so when we try exquisite food, it can feel like non-sexual orgasms.

• Clothing:

  Every shapes, colours, and textures you choose to wear can tell a lot about who you are, and what you enjoy in life. Clothes are a powerful tool for confidence and sensuality, it is like wearing a second skin. When you were pieces that make you feel good about your body, or the way you look, you unlock your emotions and allow yourself to be who you want to be.

• Nature:

  Our world is a beautiful place and need to be cherished. Next time you go outside, be aware of everything around you: the sounds, colours, shades of lighting, movement created by the wind, smells, feel the sun on your skin… Feel the energy of Life. How does it make you feel?

• Boudoir photography:

  Can you think of a more powerful way to develop your sensuality than boudoir photography? Having (pardon our french) the balls or vulva to show vulnerability by posing half naked in front of two strangers (AKA us), and still feel badass and empowered, is pretty impressive!

Now you just have to go for it!

“I never thought that sex was wrong, sinful, dirty. When you take away the thought of things being dirty or forbidden, then you can really enjoy your sensuality.” Gioconda Belli

Sensuality as a way to experience a deep peace within yourself, to feel alive and fulfill. When you embrace it, it makes you feel like you can do anything.

The world become your oyster.

And guess what?! When you feel like you can do anything, you actually start doing stuff that make you happy and 100% yourself. It is like a magical kick in the bum!

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Sharing your boudoir pictures, yes or no?

Boudoir photography is still not well known, and a lot of people don't even know why they would do a boudoir shoot to begin with. For some of those who took the decision to do it (welcome to this beautiful world 😀), the idea of sharing their pictures with other people makes them feel very uncomfortable.

We also have met people who wanted to do a shoot but decided not to because they thought they would have to share their pictures online.

Let's demystify together everything around privacy in the boudoir world.

via GIPHY

The choice is yours!

You AND ONLY YOU can decide if you want to keep your pictures private or not.

Boudoir photography can makes you feel vulnerable so you don't need to feel pressured by the photographer, your loved ones, or anyone one else, to share your pictures with the rest of the world.

When you have chosen your photographer make sure to sign a contract or a release option that says you want your pictures to stay private.

Like we said, the choice is yours, so do not let that fear of privacy stoping you from having a boudoir shoot done.

Why most people refuse to post their pictures online?

Well, most of the time it comes back to the fear of being judged. We still give too much importance to what others think of us and we easily let their judgment dictates our actions.

Part of those judgment comes from:

• Their Job:

  They are afraid to not be taken seriously if their coworkers were to see them in lingerie, especially women.

• Old Beliefs:

  A lot of people still believe nudity is shameful. A lot of women feel the need to cover up because they were told that showing too much skin is not proper or will make them looks like “whores” (ugh we hate that so much 😡)

• Social Media Haters:

  Words can be painful and some people are very sensitive to mean comments on social media. They are afraid to be harshly judged for their body, or even the act of posting pictures of them in lingerie.

There is also the fear of not knowing what their pictures will be used for, if the photographer were to share them. Once again, this can be specified in a contract between you and your photographer.

What we think as professionals and women

Even if we understand why privacy is really important for some people, we always suggest to not be afraid to post your pictures online. You will be surprised in a great way. Here is why:

• Inspire Other People

This is the first thing that will happen. If you post your boudoir pictures online (or any other experience you try that are a bit more “scandalous”) you will motivate people around you to do the same. We have so many past clients who came to us because their friends did a boudoir shoot. They were so proud to see the pictures and loved to hear the boudoir story that they wanted to do the same.

EACH OF OUR CLIENTS INSPIRED ANOTHER ONE, WE ARE IN A SENSE ALL CONNECTED BY THE LOVE OF BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHY. HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE SOMEONE'S MUSE?! 

• Boost Of Confidence

Sharing your pictures on social media can seem superficial but it is actually a great way to boost your confidence. We usually forget that the way we see ourselves is different than the way others see us. It is not because you judge yourself badly than others do. Honestly the chances are you will get amazing feedback from your loved on those pictures (not that you need approval from people but it always feels good to get compliments on either the way we look or the fact we did a boudoir shoot).

And true fact, none of our Scandals ever got negative feedback.

There is also the fact that when you dare doing something you were afraid of (or that not a lot of people do) and you get compliments from it, your confidence grows.

It makes you feel powerful, free, and you just want to keep getting out of your comfort zone to achieve even more.

• More Scandals For Our Portfolio

We love sharing our work with our community because this is how we inspire people to do a shoot for themselves. We need examples to showcase the beautiful people we took pictures of, and make people understand they don't need to be a certain age, body type, or gender to try boudoir photography.

To conclude: sharing or not your pictures is a personal decision. You can absolutely keep them 100% private, but if you decide to post them online do not feel ashamed, ever! Just do what makes you feel comfortable in the moment, you can always change your mind later 😘

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I edited my photos and I regret it

If you follow us on Instagram, you saw that Fanny and I shared some of our earliest work as photographers. What was meant to be an endearing, loving and funny post brought out an interesting realization for me: I am not able to tell on which photos I edited my body. And I deeply regret it.

The quick fix of photo editing

I started fiddling with editing softwares when I was about 15, back in 2007. At first, it was just to create little emo montages to put on my blog (yes I'm this old).

Then, I found some tutorials to alter reality and change proportions. And of course, my deeply insecure teenaged self didn't wait 2 minutes before applying it to my face and my body. Like many teenagers, my weight was the main source of my insecurities. So I went to town, shrinking my waist, my cheekbones, my legs and removing anything I thought was a flaw.

Did it make me feel better? For a split second, absolutely. I got the outside validation from my peers, I convinced myself it was better this way, which was enough for me. I was actually quite good at editing and nobody noticed. Plus, it was the early days, our eyes weren't used to spot this kind of editing.

What I didn't realize is that I was heavily feeding my insecurities.

2012 - No idea if I edited myself or not, deleted the original.

The danger of building an alternate you.

Slapping filters, changing your body: it is never just a one-off.

Once you start, it only gets worse. It is never enough. Think about it, you found an easy way to fix one "flaw", of course you are gonna find ways to fix another. And then you gonna dive in into parts of yourself you didn't have anything against, but it needs to match the rest of the edited you so… a vicious cycle begins.

I distinctly remember snapping a little auto-portrait when I was about 16 and editing everything so much that I ended up changing the size of my eyes. The. Size. Of. My. Eyes.

I remember looking at this and thinking "who the f*ck is this".

This was one of the first steps that rang a bell to me and said “Jules, you went too far". I never published this photo and I wasn't able to find it, chances are I deleted a few years ago because of that reason.

You would think that this would have led my path to self-acceptance, that I stopped editing and unicorns started dancing around me. HA!

Nope. I just transferred this virtual version of me to my real life.

2011 - Edited my waist - Beautiful proof of my body-dysmorphia as I found myself fat.

I wanted to be this virtual version I created in real life.

I got that editing was bad for me but not for the right reasons. I twisted this to "I can't edit myself anymore because it makes me feel bad, so I'm gonna change my body in real life". This was the peak of my body-dysmorphia journey and it lasted way until my mid-2os.

I was just "too fat", all the time. Losing weight didn't make a difference, i didn't see it.

It started impacting my every day life, making me not eat before taking photos, not letting people take pictures of me, controlling everything as much as I could, something that I still do to this day when I'm feeling unsafe. I am extremely lucky that I didn't develop obsessive eating disorders, I honestly have no idea how I dodged it with this way of thinking.

Walking away from this required a lot of different seeds to stop acting like an idiot.

Many of those amazing women we get to work with on the daily.

1) Letting others show me.

We are in 2011. I am photographing more and more women I find absolutely stunning while they don't technically check the beauty standard boxes blasted in front of us. They're confident, they're open about their insecurities and they don't let them dictate their lives. I see them shine during my shoots and I'm impressed.

they planted the first seeds in my brain that I could actually accept myself the way I was too.

Then I meet other women just as beautiful but not as confident and it blows my mind. I find myself believing in and encouraging THEM to shine. And I must be doing something right because it works and they believe me. Even more so, a fire starts within them and I'm loving it.

And one day, it clicks: if I see their beauty at first glance and they don't, is there a chance I'm doing the same for me? Just like that, I planted the next seed: the one that shows the lack of accuracy of negative self-talk and that I shouldn't let it take over.

2) Starting aerial silks and changing my perspective.

By this time, we are in 2013, I'm 21. I haven't edited my body in years, but instead, I simply hide it in every way I can. Out of sight, out of mind. But I'm about to plant another seed for myself without knowing: I start aerial silks.

What's the point, you may wonder?
It made me see that my body is a strong ass one, more than just an appearance.

It starts changing too, it gets fitter, things I didn't know was an option. I don't see it as much as a flawed thing anymore, it impresses me. I knew that I had to capture that in case it faded away, so I can have a keepsake. So I did. I still have this photo in my apartment and look at it often.

3) Opening Scandaleuse and stopping the hypocrisy.

I'm 25 now, I'm just starting to embrace myself the way I should. Fanny and I are brainstorming ideas about Scandaleuse. We both have this deep passion around highlighting women's beauty, especially when they don't see it.

Boudoir is the way we chose but it is still much easier to do it for others than myself. So before we even opened anything, something pushed me out of my comfort zone and I asked Fanny to shoot my first ever boudoir shoot to know what it would feel like.

Of course, I fell RIGHT BACK into my old habits: I asked to shoot at 7am to make sure I wasn't bloated, before I had eaten anything. I had a very hard time to let go and I even edited some photos (“it was just some unflattering shadows” (no it wasn't))

Photo from this shoot. Pretty sure I edited my stomach here.

Not only did it make me feel like absolute garbage to do this but this was also the first time Fanny told me I was wrong, in calm, almost sad, way.

You see, I had never anybody who actually told me that. I have had people dismissing my concerns with the flicker of a hand many times, but no one actually sat me down and tried to tell me that I might see myself in the wrong light, especially someone I deeply trusted. Fanny planted one of the biggest seeds I needed and I don't think she knows it. I'm so glad she did.

I realized I couldn't open a business about self-acceptance and kicking beauty standards in the balls if I wasn't willing to do it myself.

And if there is one thing that I can't accept, it is being a hypocrite.

It was even more important than my insecurities, it just wasn't an option. From this moment, I decided it was time to change. I never edited myself again after this.

So, is it healed?

Mostly, yes. But I don't believe it will ever go away fully. I still have moments when old habits come back and I'm tempted to edit something or cancel a shoot because I feel fat. But I force myself not to. I force myself to look at it all because going backwards would make me the biggest hypocrite, and like I said, this isn't an option.

And you know what? The “flaws” I see one day are rarely here the next. Because that's how it works with insecurities: they depend on many other factors that have nothing to do with your body. Understanding this as helped me DETACH from it all. I'm not feeling my best? It's okay, it will be back.

There you have it. This is probably the blog post that took me the most energy. Writing this all is leaving me with a deep sense of appreciation. I've come a long way and will need constant reminders, but it's okay. If you are on the same boat, I hope reading my story will help. And of course, if you feel like you're ready to get the ultimate kick in the butt with a boudoir shoot, we are here for you!

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More blog posts on the topic

Warm, industrial, and cosy lofts

OUR LOFTS PART 2:

Alright, today let’s dive in the topic of finding the perfect location for your shoot!

As mentioned in the first episode, the decors in the studio where you will do your boudoir shoot is very important to match the vibe you wanna give to your pictures. Most photographers already have their own studio so you will not really have a choice in the aesthetic of the location.

But other photographers like us rent different places around the city to keep their creativity up and not give their clients the same pictures as anyone else.

Homy atmosphere? Yes please!

Those New York style lofts are our favourites because they usually mix bricks and beams, have beautiful vintage decors, tons of plants, and for some reasons the sofas are absolutely stylish, large, and comfy 😍

Since they are industrial, they always have those huge windows that bring up so much natural light in the space and creates contrasty lighting when the sun is out.

People who live in those lofts can be artsy peeps so most of the time you can find gorgeous pieces hanging on the walls.

Who are those type of lofts for?

If you like neutral and minimalist pictures, stay away from industrial atmosphere. Those locations are definitively better for the warm tons and busy background lovers.

Since there is a lot going on decor wize in those lofts, your outfits (or even your beautiful-self) will pop up less than in a more neutral space. In our opinion it is never a problem because we use the space to match perfectly each set and create unique photographs that look stunning as a whole.

It is like you are part of the painting 🎨

And if you enjoy everything that is vintage and pin up style, you will for sure love those type of spaces!

What if I am more like a blank canvas?

If you don’t really have ideas of the vibe you want your boudoir shoot to have, or like any type of decors, then follow your photographer’s guidance and trust the process. At the end of the day the main focus should be YOU 😘

Feeling more like the adventurer type? What about trying an outdoor boudoir shoot! Those are next level and you can take it in nature or in the city!

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Pure, simple, & minimalist lofts

Our lofts part 1:

Today, let’s talk about minimalist lofts and why they can be a beautiful option when it comes to boudoir!

We love scouting new lofts in the city for our sessions and seeing stars in the eyes of our clients when they see where we are making their shoot happens. When we opened Scandaleuse Photography 5 years ago, we took the decision to rent multiple studios rather than the same one so we can have more creative freedom and give our clients pictures that truly reflect their style.

Why is the decors important in boudoir photography?

The location is part of the artistic approach and will impact a lot the lighting, the poses, and the general vibe. When we take picture of you, we make sure your surrounding will highlight your beautiful-self and the atmosphere you want to have to each shot.

Let say for example you are someone who wants a Femme Fatale look and love moody pictures, having your photos taken in a loft that has an airy boho vibe with touch a girly colours will absolutely not match what you are looking for.

When you chose your photographer, make sure they can follow your ideas and adapt the decors to the general atmosphere you have in mind.

Alright, let’s dive into the Scandinavian vibe!

The most amazing thing about decors that have simple furniture and white tons is the neutrality they offer. They are perfect for everyone, either you are looking to highlight your femininity, masculinity, or a mix of both.

Since the walls are usually minimalist with no patterns or vibrant colours, every outfits pop up very nicely and allow the model (AKA you) to really be the focus of the picture.

Empty white walls are also really nice to create a more “fashion magazine” vibe and make you do poses that are artistic and less traditional.

Those type of lofts are for people who love simplicity and modernity.

For a lot of people, photographers included, boudoir is all about a romantic vibe, posing on a bed, wearing lace lingerie with garter belt. Don’t get us wrong, this type of classic boudoir is very pretty, but in our opinion you can have so much fun for your shoot and be very creative, while staying away from looking traditional (unless this is what you are looking for, which is of course absolutely fine). So don’t hesitate to think outside the box for your session.

Something that is really nice to do when you are thinking of doing a boudoir shoot is to create a Pinterest board and save ideas you can find there (anything from the lighting, poses, outfits,…). It is a lot of fun to do and it will help you to find inspiration to create something cool for yourself!

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4 simple ways to be yourself

“You just have to be yourself and everything will be ok!” they say, but what the heck does it mean?

This is the big question we asked some of the people from our community and we have to say, we got fantastic answers:

- “Don’t care about what other people think of you and what you do. Only you can decide what you want to be.”

- “Being happy with who you are.”

- “Being comfortable with every aspect of yourself (physical, emotional, mental).”

- “Owning everything, little thing that makes you YOU by doing it unapologetically.”

Be UNAPOLOGETICALLY you, we got a pretty amazing definition here! But how do you reach to this state of self-acceptance?

1 - Understand your qualities and flaws

You need to figure out who you are in order to be yourself… Yeah we know it sounds obvious but think about it for a minute:

What makes you, YOU? Who are you as a person and with others?

We all are a combination of "good and bad” traits that mostly defines our personality: Are you funny? Selfish? Kind?… With your own terms, what are your characteristics?

Listing your qualities and flaws is a good way to understand how you function, evaluate yourself and manage your emotions, so you can change the way you react to them when they are triggered by an event or a person. Once you understood and welcomed those parts of you, it gets easier to align your behaviour with your values, without letting other people's opinions impacted it.

Little side note: remember that qualities and flaws, like art, are an abstract concept. They are defined by how people see you, what they think is proper or not, and the life situations you are in. Some people might be annoyed by some of your qualities, where others might appreciate your flaws. For example your kindness could trigger people who are not used to receive love or help, they might get frightened and not trust your good intentions.

Never make yourself smaller because someone is telling you you are too loud, too proud, too ambitious…

2 - Focus on your growth

It is really easy to desire someone else’s life, especially with social media. Since it is unusual for people to share their struggles, we imagine they got it all figure it out. Your neighbour’s grass is always greener than yours right?!

We, humans, have the tendency to romanticize everything. We want this couple relationship, this person happiness. We wish to have their skills, their job, their personality, their freedom, and beauty. Because on paper everything look shinny, their life is perfect, they have it so easy… But that is not the reality! We ALL go through tough times. It is important to remember that!

So instead of wishing to be someone else, express your uniqueness:

1. Stop comparing yourself to others, you have your own strengths and weaknesses;

2. Improve what you are good at and have the desire to learn to open your mind up to new things;

3. If people around you are not happy with your lifestyle then it’s on them. Their opinion should not impact your life.

   Focus on what makes YOU happy.

3 - Accept to change

A lot of people lose themselves because they are too afraid to change their life to go after what they want. They end up feeling frustrated, angry, and sad. But it is part of life, we all changed! You are not the same person as you were 5 years ago, and the future you will also be different than who you are now.

Both Juliette and I want to make big changes in our personal life. We both have that urge to buy our own property closer to nature. And it is scary AF, it means getting rid of big money blocs. But we know that if we don’t work towards this “calling”, we will regret it.

Being true to ourselves is also about letting go of things that are no longer working for us (can be people, work, own beliefs,…) to make room to a more fulfilling life.

4 - Let your inner child run wild

Did you notice how free young kids are? They are their true essence because they haven't been conditioned to follow society's rules yet. They live in the moment and don't care about people's opinion. Isn't it something you wish you could have back sometimes? That innocence, that freedom?

As adults we can be pretty uptight, feeling we have to be serious most of the time because we have “responsibilities”. Feeling judge by others if we dare being a bit different. So we put the fun on the side and focus on our struggles and drama.

But what if instead we allow ourselves to be silly and enjoy the moment? Go jump on a trampoline, cartwheel in the grass, make silly faces at your reflection, dance in the rain… whatever makes you feel like a kid again!

Put the mask down and allow yourself to be the natural you!

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Once upon a time, Boudoir Photography...

Boudoir is the story of our life, Scandaleuse is our baby. Most of you have been following us for 5 years now. You’ve shared our successes and struggles, you've seen all of the beautiful Scandals who posed in front of our lenses, bref… you are part of this community! And if you are new here, welcome :)

But do you know how Boudoir was born and how scandalous & naughty it was?

No? Then follow us in our world…

Boudoir: The Origins (like superheroes!)

A Boudoir was a woman's private sitting room or salon in a furnished accommodation, in aristocratic families. It was a sign of femininity and social conformity as a woman.

Nobody will be surprised to read that the term derives from the French verb "Bouder" which means "to sulk". Long story short, it was a room dedicated for sulking in.  (allez la France, la révolution, et la baguette)

Thanks to the Marquis De Sade and his book “Philosophy in the Bedroom”, the Boudoirs turned into sulphurous and scandalous rooms, where women could speak privately. It was characterized in literary and cultural studies as erotic and as a metaphor of  womens' bodies.  Boudoir was generally understood as a site for secret pleasures and libertinage. A room where women could bring their lovers… Naughty you!!!

Side Note:  Boudoir is also a biscuit you eat with Champagne. Shhh, that’s how we like it...

BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHY : The early days

Over the years, Boudoir became a photography style and started celebrating the beauty, femininity and freedom of women. It has been featuring intimate, sensual, and sometimes erotic images of its subjects.

The nude or sexualized female form has been a theme of photography since as early as 1840 but it was in the 1920s that Boudoir photography began to take shape as an art form. Photographers, like Albert Arthur Allen, took images of women who posed in romantic ways against ornate backdrops or furniture.

But Boudoir photography was illegal in the 1920s (woman nudity was offensive and considered pornographic - What about now in 2022, mentalities did not change that much 😡) and photographers were often arrested or heavily fined for taking the photos.

But this didn't stop anyone

1930s and ‘40s, at the beginning of World War II the US government started using pin-up girls on their recruiting posters as propaganda to encourage young men to fight for the country. The military knew that sex sells and was using slogans like “She’s worth fighting for” or “Come home to your girl a hero” to encourage those men to go to war.

This move made the pin-up style one of the most famous form of boudoir which paved the way for modern boudoir by normalizing the female form in advertising.

1950s, the “pinup girls” became very famous in the Boudoir world. They wore nylons, stilettos and elegant elbow-length gloves. These girls even played with androgyny, wearing bow-ties and top hats along with their corsets and stockings.

By the 1970s, the female figure began being recognized as a significant form of sexual liberation and a new revolution in Boudoir. 

Unfortunately, much of society still had a difficult time acknowledging Boudoir as a tasteful genre, even if these photos were artistic and no way considered pornographic amongst the art world.

In the next few decades, Boudoir photography became very popular and broke free of women’s boundaries.

Now it is a symbol of freedom for women but also men and non-binary people. It's all about owning your body… the art of accepting and loving yourself!

More amazing content and cool blogs this way ⬇️

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